Articles

It’s Been A Month

In Everyday, Life, Personal, Uncategorized on July 9, 2022 by lexie-chan Tagged: , , , ,

Before you know it, baby Andy is not a newborn anymore!

Yerpz, I’m a mom now! It happened so quickly, I still can’t believe it. The journey was so bitter sweet. Like, I wanted it to be over but now that it was over, it was like it went by so fast! Is it possible that you kinda miss being pregnant? Like, you’re gonna miss the kicks and rolls your baby makes inside your belly when he’s still growing inside you. Sighhhhh…

But it finally happened, and we were so excited to meet baby Andy finally!

So anyway, before my memories fade away, I want to recount the moment before the baby was born. So, after a couple of months of being pregnant, I was diagnosed with a Gestational Diabetes Mellitus. So I tried my best to manage it and luckily, I was able to with the help of insulin. However, because of my condition, I would need to have an induced labor. They don’t want me to reach 40 weeks because the baby may grow too big and there are many complications for the mom and the baby if we reach that stage so we planned on getting him induced on May31, for a June 1 birth. That would have been exactly his 39th week. I planned for this a couple of weeks prior and honestly, everything was going smoothly. Heck, I even planned to work on the 31st coz I’ll be admitted at around 8PM that day anyway but well, I guess you can’t really predict and plan for something.

So, on May 29, I was already having a hard time sleeping. I feel like I kept on waking up because my stomach was hurting. It did before but it felt especially different that night. The frequency was just so much more than it was before. May 30th was the memorial weekend (so we don’t have work) and when I woke up, I told R that I was having pain throughout the night and I know that it was not normal. I was anxious especially the pain was really intense that I just curl into a ball on the bed. So R called the hospital and asked them if we should just go in. At that point, I think I was having contractions about 4-5 times in an hour. The hospital personnel said that we should stay put and only come to the hospital if the contractions happens every five minutes. Fine, if that’s protocol, then we’ll abide to it so I took Tylenol and started counting around 9:55AM. I was recording the whole thing on my phone for three hours and true enough, my contractions were happening in a 5-8 minute interval so we really might be seeing the baby that day!

Nervous, we packed our stuff and proceeded to the hospital. My water didn’t break but we knew it was happening. When we got there, we got admitted. It was funny because before we were transferred to the triage room, the nurse was reading our address (Butte View) and she mentioned it as “Boo-Tey”. HAHA! I remember really laughing at that because everyone really have a hard time pronouncing that name. But anyway, we were finally roomed in to this triage room but at first, we didn’t know it was the triage room. It was small and it only has one chair. I got the bed of course and R had a hard time organizing our bags before settling down on the chair.

After some time, a nurse finally came in and checked me out. She asked what prompted us for the visit and I relayed to her that I’ve been having cramps with a bit of an intensity than usual, at a 5-8 minute intervals that for the past few hours. When she got the details she needed, she checked how dilated I was at that time. I was already 3cm dilated. I honestly didn’t think I was that much dilated actually. So yeah, it was definitely time for me to have the baby any time soon so they proceeded to preparing the room for us.

We got transferred shortly to the labor and delivery room. It was definitely bigger and more comfortable. We have ample space for our bags and even a long couch for sleeping. It was funny coz the nurse who attended to me was named Tiffany Hwang. HAHAHA! Since I am already in labor, the nurse started prepping for me and omg, it is one of my dreaded thing in the world… getting poked by a needle. And it’s my first time getting an IV too! As expected, it was not a pleasant feeling. In fact, I got poked 4 times before they successfully found a suitable place for the IV line. The other spots bloomed into a beautiful (not!) cluster of bruises I looked like I was physically abused…

Anyway, since I’m finally settled in bed, with all the medication/sustenance I need for the duration of my labor, I told R to finally fetch my sister. I got admitted unexpectedly so our previous plan didn’t pan out well regarding her, coming with us in the hospital. And of course I want my sister with me as a support if anything! So he left and I stayed in the empty room, bearing the contractions. And I gotta tell you, it was really painful. I didn’t expect the pain to be that intense when I’m not even delivering. I thought delivering is when the real pain happens but boy, was I mistaken because the pain I had to go through almost every 5 minutes was unimaginable. And honestly, I should’ve just taken the epidural when they first asked for me about it instead of waiting because freakin R and my sister took FOREVER to come back!!! So I was hurting by myself in the room. Ugh. I was so afraid that the epidural would wear off if I took it too quickly so I was hanging on to dear life. Ugh,

Eventually, they finally came and I asked for the epidural then and there. The anesthesiologist did come in. it was a meticulous process where they need to sterilize my back before I get poked again, and that’s fine and honestly, I want him to hurry up too coz at that point, I was almost bursting and needed to go to the bathroom. I couldn’t go to the bathroom previously because I was due to get my Foley catheter and I need my bladder full for it so yeah, I can’t relieve myself so I needed to wait. But jfc. There was only one anesthesiologist and of course somebody just had to call him for an effing emergency so he had to stop in the middle of my prep and dash out to see the other patient. Ugh. It was really annoying but I can’t say I have any choice in the matter. Also because it was actually a holiday, Memorial Day, so the hospital was also understaffed. So alas, I had to wait for him to come back but at that point, I couldn’t wait any longer and didn’t care so I went to bathroom and finally relieved myself. It felt so good!!!

Now that I don’t have that burden of needing to pee, I went back to the bed and the anesthesiologist came back fairly quickly. He had to re-prep me but I wasn’t a bit remorseful at that. So I just waited for him until I felt that painful prick on my spine. I remember it being cold too. And then, almost immediately like magic, the pain went away and my ghad… It was so blissful. I actually love the feeling! When they inserted the FC, I also didn’t feel anything. Although I’m sure it’s another procedure that would’ve hurt me a lot… But nope, nothing. Contraction pain was not an issue for me either. I’ve become calmer.

I got checked again, maybe it’s around 5ish now, and I was 6cm. I thought that I was having a fairly easy and fast labor actually. We came at 2ish and I was 3cm and then in a matter of 3 hours, I’ve significantly dilated again. I couldn’t remember the sequence much after that but at one point, I was asked if I want to get Pitocin to speed things up and I agreed to it. When I was already 9cm dilated, that’s when the medical personnel came in to help me deliver. Just a nurse and a trainee with my name. LOL! The doctor was not there.

So, we started pushing around 12 midnight? Luckily, there was no more pain for me, just some dull sensation or touch and movement so I honestly don’t know if my pushing was actually right or not but I was having a hard time with the breathing because I had to hold my breath for 10 seconds (really difficult, I tell you!) and strain. I was exhausted and R and my sister were definitely exhausted as well. Oh, I didn’t know they would be physically helping me deliver actually. Nearly 20 years ago, when I was doing some hospital duties, I did labor and delivery as part of my training and then, only the nurses and the doctor handle the whole thing in the room. Granted, families weren’t really there for the delivery but in my head, they are literally there just as a support. Maybe to hold my hand or to tell me comforting words but not lifting my legs! Gosh. It was really embarrassing if I think about it but I was so focused on the process that shame just doesn’t have a room in my head that time. Especially when we were all trying to push the baby for almost 3 months at that point without any significant progress! My legs were numb (but I didn’t dislike the feeling, just felt really strange), I threw up a couple of times coz of the meds, exhausted, and still, no progress when it came to delivering the baby. It was already around 3am that time and the doctor finally came and tried a little bit more with me to see if I can still have a normal delivery but nope. It was just not happening because of the way the baby was positioned. The doctor then told me that we would need to do a C-section. I wasn’t really happy about that and asked her if we can perform episiotomy to widen my birth canal but she said that it would do little help so she would not recommend it so yeah… Despite my strong dislike with the idea, we had to do it. I had to go under the knife…

I got moved to an OR, got another dose of meds and was laid on the OR bed with my hands spread outward as if I was on a freakin’ cross. It was so mad. And then I had this very uncomfortable pillow too that really hurt my neck. Just a few minutes after getting the meds in my system, I had to hurl again! JFC, I swear to go god, I’ve been having a lot of these unpleasant experience and I was so grossed out by the whole thing but I had to persevere. It was a shame that only one person was allowed so my sister was left outside, somewhere.

I was awake the whole time while the procedure was happening but meds too strong, I didn’t feel a thing! Though I was shaking so hard. It looked like I was possessed! It was such an exhausting ordeal… I don’t know how long the operation was but eventually, Baby Andy came to our lives! He’s a precious, 6lbs and 14oz healthy baby boy with LOTS of hair! I only got to see him, I didn’t get the immediate skin to skin for some reason. Maybe because I was CS? Iuno… But he was there and I was so happy!

They had to take the baby while they were closing me up. That point in time was really hazy in my head, the exhaustion was too much so I just let them do their work as I drift away.

I was very weak, too. I felt that I went into battle but I was so blessed that my family was complete. My mom came just in time for Baby Andy, too! Unfortunately, nobody can stay over night with me at the hospital but I got visits from all my family during visiting hours and they try to stay with me until visiting time was over. I got tremendous help from the hospital staffs too because I couldn’t do everything myself. I was hooked to the IV and Fc. I had a major surgery and I was still throwing up with pain all over. Baby Andy stayed in the nursery the whole time we were in the hospital but the staffs are great and I know that he is in good hands. I also couldn’t breastmilk and honestly, it was frustrating for the baby too coz he couldn’t latch so he’s been taking baby formula at the beginning of his life but you know what, fed is best.

So yeah, after a few days, making sure that the baby and I are both healthy and safe, we went home. Yay! I really missed home. I’ll miss the help I’ve gotten from the nurses in the hospital but nothing beats your own home. My healing process and caring for the baby has been the whole thing I’ve done in the first month after the baby was born and whew! I can’t believe he’s one month old now and he’s so heavy and amazing and my gosh… we love him to death! We’re obsessed with him!!! I really want to be just near him every time! Ugh.

From now on, R’s and my life will be forever change. We’ll try our best to be the best parents for him and I hope we can do a good job at it. Baby Andy is so loved! We’re looking forward to see him grow day by day.

I love you, baby ko!

(I didn’t even bother reading and editing. I just had a word vomit because I want to recount the whole experience as best as I can so I can always have something to look back on. Again, love you baby ko!)

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