Posts Tagged ‘SONE’

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Into The New World

In Fandom,Life,Personal,Rant on December 9, 2014 by lexie-chan Tagged: , , , , , ,

I don’t expect anyone to understand but SNSD, unknowingly, has become a huge part of my life.

They were this figure that kept me going and happy when nothing was going right in my life (I knew about them when I was struggling with my nursing). They were… special.

And for the last couple of years, I’ve spent my time watching over them. Loving them, supporting them and I just–

I really can’t explain it and it’s quite bewildering, even to me, how much they are so close to my heart that it came to the point that it hurts me so much to see how that beautiful friendship had to suffer like that when Jessica left the group.

I’m sure nobody wished for this and if there were other means but this unprecedented parting, they would’ve done it already. Only, most unfortunately, they were caught in the inevitable and is now forced to wear a brave face as if this does not have an effect on them because honestly, if we’re all hurting from the break up, I’m sure the girls are suffering a hundred times more than us.

In the end, I’m blabbering all this because it is quite amazing and painful hearing the girls sing Into The New World without Jessica to complete the melody.

You see, at least for me, Into The New World was SNSD’s song. They were born with this song and the song was born with them. It was the perfect beginning for all of them and ultimately, the perfect ending now that we’ve come to this point.

It was just so painful.

The emotion that poured from them when they sang it and perhaps the crumbling feeling inside they couldn’t hide anymore… It was… All sort of emotion was in this song alone.

And I hate hate hate it that while I’m having this rollercoaster feeling inside, nobody can really understand my positiin so I throw myself in a corner instead and wallow silently. Wishing that someday — soon — I’ll be over this, too.

I guess I’m just really waiting for a proper closure. Idk.

But for right now, let me swim in my own pathetic feels. Ghad. Does this feeling suck