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Unhappy.

In Life,Personal,Rant on February 22, 2022 by lexie-chan Tagged: , , , , ,

I guess the reason why I’m so unhappy about this whole living arrangement is because I know we definitely have a choice, and yet, this is still how it ended up to be.

I understand that we’re doing this because of his health and that we will benefit from their help when it comes to the baby but it doesn’t mean that because I understand, I’ll suddenly be okay with everything.

I miss being just us. That we are our own priority. Now I feel I have to compete with attention and every decisions, I need to run with other people. I miss the privacy and the life we lived with just the both of us.

Now, besides sacrificing that family life that we were just starting to build, we have this whole debt of gratitude hanging around our necks, too. It feels so trapping and dire. And I pray and pray that our love for each other will be stronger than what I’m feeling right now because I know it’s a me problem. And I also know it’s a process but my ghad. I’m really so, sooo unhappy…